The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

“Dragged up from the underworld

Just like some precious pearl”-- The Go-Gos (Our Lips Are Sealed)



"Death ogles thee both here and everywhere, writhing, ridiculous humanity, and oft, myrrh-scented too, she comes to share in irony, thine own insanity!"



The Calling was strong, and I heeded it.

It soaked into my very bones and caused a heightened awareness that I was not use to-- everything and nothing came to mind and fogged my vision. I 'traveled' more, daydreamt more, even.

It picked away at me, wanting me to break apart reason and find my own reasoning in things, both mundane and magickal. Even my Apple Wand’s ‘call’ seemed weak, having been carved and polished in the heart of Ireland to end up in my hot little hands. With this I started to feel more alive-- taste, smell, everything was greater as if it was happening for the very first time.

Though I had only been on Don’s site for less than 3 months, I felt a kinship to those present there. I was determined to feed this calling I had, and figure out exactly where I fit in.



3/31/06

For Las Vegas and finding my way as needed, I indeed followed the dark to find my light. I listened even with my horrible hearing due to infection to grasp a sense of ambience. I touched to experience even more—texture after texture peaking my interest whether my eyes were closed or open to the light. My money dwindled to meet my ends, and my so-called love life collapsed as I tossed odds over ends into a suitcase and left with the greatest smile I could muster. I was ‘Called’ and I felt it. I dove into the shallow end only to find the most amazing feeling, as if I had drown and been lifted up at the same exact moment.

There was no turning back—I didn’t care.

I was following my Bliss for the first time, and it was like tasting Life straight from the bottle.

I called Rezza only to find out she had troubles and could not make it, but I let her know she’d be with me in spirit. I tried to sleep on the plane to some music. I ate for the first time all day. It was some excellent cheese I recognized only because I had to have some in a class of mine, some dried apricots that I’ve come to fancy since the trip, and water to dry and wet my nervousness.

I departed the plane, gathered my things, and made my shaky contact with Ellie. I changed into something I felt was more suiting the evening, and stepped out onto the curb. I got many looks from the others there. Compliments on my deeply cut top, why weren’t I freezing from the lack of something covering my shoulders, etc. I was pumping the blood through my veins so quickly; I didn’t have time to react to the cold. I needed to find the others; I needed to find where I belonged.

I tipped my driver well, thanking him for the insight into this new, fresh place, and made my way through the door. We weren’t in O-town anymore, rat.

Through the KRAVE I found the others, the ones I was meant to stay with found me as I found them, both Keyeo and Batspell. An enlightened, social smile upon Don's face certainly gave me a sense of being as the others danced, drank and made merry.

We sat in our corner, watching the dancers dance to the music of the night-- Nine Inch Nails to the cheers of those not gathering up the last of the valet keys. Don let word spread that we were leaving, so I gathered up my humble bit of luggage, and we ladies went off to find the car.

We retired to a well-decorated hotel room and broke the ice further, speaking of long-loved stuffed animals, as children would do, watching videos and laughing... more drinking as I only watched, observed. I wondered whom I could speak to easily, and to whom I would shy away from. (The latter was easy as hours passed into the weekend.)

We then bundled ourselves up as best we could and stole into the dawn to reside at the Golden Palm. I took the floor gladly, meeting Sterling and her Mate in haste. As I lay, falling asleep, I breathed in my sigh of relief. In letting it go, I let out a breath of joy.



4/01/06

I had noticed something in the glare of the elevator mirror, an odd yellow-gold tint to my eyes I had not seen before—at least, not directly in the mirror, but in pictures of myself. I admit I dismissed this for the most part, but still I wonder now if something was triggered this first night of what I feel to have been my new life. I’ve felt free since then, but I digress.

Already the sun started to irritate my skin, my shades giving no hope to my drying yet tearful eyes. We finally made our way out to the Deuce, letting it take us through the streets with a bit more haste. We chattered back and forth, wondering if we were going to be late, or unfashionably early. Onward we went, most of us nervous, but cheerful.

To Caesar’s Palace we went—I had never seen such a beautiful structure—as if being outside and yet not a breeze at all. I found comfort in it, taking pictures like mad, hoping some would burn into my memory. The water fountains, the fish tanks—it made me miss the ocean more and more, having been born so near to one. I made a little wish to come back to that place under more romantic (or in the least, fruitful) terms, and we continued on our way, hoping not to get lost.

With much time to spare, we waited. After some time, the others crept in from their crypts, as it were. I was actually quite surprised at our numbers. I saw more faces than I had made out in the dark the night before. I felt more at peace, at home wanting to talk but too shy to. I spoke with a few, off almost in a corner, a few seats away from our host and hostess. Having left most of my good clothes back in Orlando in such a hurry, I admit I was a bit self-conscious. I tried to hide from the camera, red-faced due to a horrible sunburn from work—damn them and their lack of shade for me to hide in.

After filling ourselves, many went to the Nine Inch Nails concert. Our little coven of misfits made its way back to the Deuce, moving back to the hotel to talk of philosophy, how much the trip had already changed our lives for the better, and really just enjoy each other’s company.

Hours passed as it crept to the Witching Hour, the time set to make our way to Don’s home. Many were there though some seemed to have retired for the evening. TJ Pendragon worked his magic behind the lenses once the ‘riffraff’ of another small party made their way back to their own company. I watched, listened even though I was rather drowsy at this point. I was still trying to pick up on a few things. Admiring a few choice individuals—and trying not to appear as if I was staring at Don. I just felt safe with his energy around. Same with the admins-- once we talked that is.

This evening had brought ice-cold chills, and yet the company and taste of wine brought warmth above my bootlaces.

We retired shortly after to let our hosts rest (though it seemed they felt bad for kicking us out)



4/02/06

After some real breakfast (at lunch), we waited for another of our party to meet with us before walking to The Palms. They never made it, so we were left to our own devices, walking out to the hotel.

Tired feet on our ‘death march’ as we called it, we were nearly 2-4 blocks away when we got to a dead end at the railroad tracks. Sterling and I were making read to scale over them, but Batspell just didn’t have the energy. We started to turn back, finally getting a cab, we went back to the hotel room to relax and talk.

We laughed, told each other of our spirituality on this trip—it didn’t seem much when we first talked, but by the end it really was amazing. We came up with the jingle of ‘Vamp Camp,’ much to the dismay of those on either side of our hotel room, as we burst out laughing nearly shaking the walls down.

Sterling and her sweetie decided to get to bed, knowing they had an early flight out and we wished them well. Keyeo, Batspell and I made our way out to gothic bowling night, early as always and just taking everything in as we waited. Keyeo did rather well, many talked, took pictures and the like. I gathered a few positive comments on my cell phone picture skills from Pendragon, and talked writing shop with Corvis. I also acquired a copy of his book (fascinating!), which he had signed, as well as Don and the beautiful model Talia Juliette. After reading he book I found such strength in those interviewed. I hope I come off as intelligent one day.

Don crept up off to my side at one point, running his nails down my back. I asked why he stopped and he continued down my back and arms. It was a great feeling—those nails are –very- well kept.